Manipulation

"Here's to the missed opportunities from being shy and having low self esteem. "

That there is a motivational quote. That comes directly from a social media website and it's a good example of how exactly these abusive people start getting their claws into you and how they use it to get control of you.

See, what they like to do is they like to constantly find things that you're insecure about or constantly find things that are true that are negative characteristics about you. So if you have low self-esteem and you are shy reading that will make you actually feel defective. It won't create a sense of loss as in your defectiveness has caused you to lose something because of it.

This is what they want. They want you to turn on yourself and start attacking yourself in this way. Because it will open you up for more further manipulation because when they start themselves insulting you then you're already on their side so it gets real easy to lower your self-esteem and to lower your self-esteem goes the more control the exercise because you will start to depend on them more for approval than ever before. This is called emotional dependence. It's where they create a situation where you feel so bad about yourself all the time that you're trying to get their approval all the time which means they have full control over you because you're always looking to them to make sure that they approve of what it is that you're doing.

There's a group of women that have started this group where they practice all of their abuse tactics together they share them and they get good at them. There was even even a program put around them in order to get control over men and and start to screw with their mind and conditionally program them into being the people that they want. This is a real experiment that's currently going on.

They will utilize these strategies to basically screw your mind and to make you emotionally dependent or or give you learned helplessness. Learned helplessness is where they put you in a situation where you can never seem to fix your situation at all and then they blame you for it. So if you were doing something and they sabotaged it constantly then they would blame you for not getting it done. The sabotage of course would be covert and it would be hard to prove that they actually did anything. But they did.

And this is the strategy of the cult and the strategy of the abuser. Doing this strategy will effectively start to wear down your sense of self-worth and your sense of ability of getting things done. The only bad thing is it seems to come off easier than it does to come back on. Once they strip it down it doesn't necessarily bolt back on really easy. Trying to get to that point where you're confident again and trying to get to that point where things are working for you again is very very difficult sometimes.

This is especially true when they hold some type of power over you. If they are invading your life in some way and they refuse to let go. Then they have their clutches deep into your organs pretty much and they won't let him go. Because as long as they're embedded into your life they control you and that's what this is all about it's all about control.

So, colts love to do this to people. They love to make them second-guess themselves and they love to do it by putting out some statement like that which implies that they are inherently defective and it does start to internalize. They will start to feel like they're defective and like they've missed out on things because of this and then it creates that sense of urgency within them to fix whatever is wrong with them and oftentimes whatever it is is just the activity that the cult leader wanted. So they'll find ways to use mental manipulation like this to get you to do exactly what they want